Good Omens

The Great Sir Terry Pratchett died a few weeks ago. He joined Brutha, Constable Cuddy, Archchancellor Weatherwax and many others in the great beyond. Terry Pratchett was a genius and master of comedy. Fortunately, his works are as prolific as they were entertaining. He left us over forty discworld novels along with a whole cannon of other works. I decided to revisit one of his books as a small, insignificant homage to him. I chose the only one I have on audiobook.

Title: Good Omens
Author: Neil Gaiman
Format: Audiobook
Time to Finish: 14 days

Good Omens is a book that starts (very briefly) in Eden, as Adam and Eve are being exiled. We are introduced to Aziraphale (an angel) and Crowly (a demon). We then jump to eleven years before present day (at time of publishing, so 1980ish). Two Dukes of Hell inform Crowley that the antichrist has been born, and it is time to appropriately place him. Crowley brings him to the hospital specially created for this purpose, but due to misunderstood body language and three identical baby boys the antichrist is placed with the wrong family. Crowley and Aziraphale agree to influence the antichrist evenly, so that it is his choice of which side to take during the apocalypse is the son of satan's alone.
Eleven years later, the apocalypse is upon us, but there's only one problem. No one actually knows where or even who the antichrist is. Chaos and shenanigans ensue.
The story follows two main plot lines. That of Adam and "the Them" (the antichrist and his gang of fellow eleven year olds), and that of Crowley and Aziraphale. Other major players are the four horsemen of the apocalypse, the witch hunters, and the witches, with many side characters diving in and out at various points.
While the book is beloved, and quite fun, it is not perfect. To be honest, it's actually a bit of a let down. I like Gaiman, I love Pratchett, but the two writing together does not make the final product greater than the sum of its parts. While this book is quite good, one would expect it to be great. It's not. It's undeniably entertaining, but there a few flaws that are not only distracting, they are quite telling. Firstly, there are too mainly plot lines and characters. I wonder if this is because there are two authors, and so twice the amount of story that one should expect in a book (especially such a short one).
Additionally, the audience for the novel is unclear as the authors seem unable to decide upon their target. The story spends a good deal of time with eleven year old's, and so it sometimes seems childish and designed as a children's story, or maybe young adult. And then at other points it seems to be well over the head of any child. This can be done well, but here this just makes everything seem inconsistent.
My final complaint is the uneven pacing. No one is surprised. The first half the book covers everything leading to the final days, and the second half covers that day or so. I would have much preferred a longer book that gave more time to the rest of the story, characters, and plotlines. I guess that's the core complaint. They needed a longer book in which to fit all their ideas and content.
Still, the book is funny, thought-provoking, and often quite brilliant. Any Pratchett, Gaiman, or fantasy fan will enjoy it. I just know it could have been even better.
6/10

I missed one, so today you get two

Sorry to my 1-2 loyal fans. Sometimes having a real job means you have no energy left to fun things, like read or write. I'm not reading nearly enough books to keep up with a 2 post per week schedule, but we'll try to persevere through and get some books I have read in the past. Or maybe I'll start getting guest reviews, or reviewing other things, like movies. Movies of books even!
Anyway, here's the first post for today.

Title: The World of Ice and Fire
Author(s): George R. R. Martin, Elio Garcia, Linda Antonsson
Format: Hard Cover
Time to Finish: A long time

I'm an aSoIaF fanatic, so when I heard about this book I started to giving subtle hints to those around me that it would be a wonderful gift. I then started giving less subtle hints.  Finally I bought it for myself. It was cheaper than I expected, but to be honest I was willing to pay way too much money to get this coffee table decoration.
To anyone interested in reading this: it is not a story, novel, or epic. It is a history book about a made up world. Unless you are the most diehard of fans, this book be something you look at a few times and then leave to collect dust. You may even ignore the words and just look at the illustrations, which are fantastic. They're probably worth the cost of the book alone. This is also not worthwhile to TV series only fans. The books and series have started to diverge, and this text is true to the books (as the show should be, but that's an argument for elsewhere). The bottom line is: unless you are obsessed, stay away.
Now that I've scared off the weak of heart: this book is awesome. The book is a text book, but contains tons of information and stories that are not found within the books. The book is "written" by a maestar of the Citidal as a gift for King Tommen I and charts the history of the realm. It starts with the Targaryens and there flight from old Valyria. After spending some time on the great kingdoms of those early days, it is chronicle the reign of the Dragon Kings. It goes through them one by one, in order, explaining the deeds and failings of each ruler. Upon reaching the fall of the dragons, the tome turns to the seven kingdoms. It goes through each one, exploring its history prior to the Andal Invasion and integration through modern day. After the kingdoms are through, the maestar turns to the rest of known world, from the free to cities to the shadow lands. As I mentioned before, this is written by a person within the fantasy realm, so we are only privy to the information he knows about these realms and legends. The further away in time or location, the less concrete fact there is.
I loved this because I'm a nerd, but this is the type of book that needs to be taken in small doses. It is a history text, and the language is a mix between that and a bard telling a story. It's a long, tiring read, which fills your head with completely useless knowledge. But it's fun useless knowledge, and I thoroughly enjoyed reading it.
8/10

A Mordbid Taste for Bones

I read this book back in January. I had just finished a book on the Plantagenet Kings, and wanted something as a buffer before I started reading about the War of the Roses, which I haven't read yet because it's only out in hardcover prices. Someone mentioned this series to me, and as a fan of both mystery and historical fiction I gave it a try.

Title: A Morbid Taste for Bones
Author: Ellis Peters (Edith Pargeter)
Format: Kindle
Time to Finish: 13 days

The premise of the book is that the Benedictine monk Brother Cadfael and some of his fellow clergy set off on a quest to retrieve the bones of a neglected Saint in Wales. Despite having the blessing of the archbishop and the prince of Wales, things don't go smoothly, and our monks soon find themselves embroiled in a murder mystery.
It was an entertaining and quick read, not even 200 pages. And I enjoyed it, but there were a few things that were less enjoyable. There seemed to be no set pacing or speed of the story. Scenes were arbitrarily short or long with no real logic. It made it hard to determine what was important and what was authorial self indulgence. Additionally, there was probably a little too much time spent on the churchly aspects for my taste. It's interesting to hear how different prayers dictated and divided the day, but it might not need to be mentioned every single day over the course of the study.
Finally, too much time was spent on praising the intelligence and attractiveness of the two female characters. It seemed a little over the top because it recurred with every appearance of the two characters. Establishing their merits early on was more than enough for reader, but apparently not for the author.
So now that I've said lots of terrible things about the story, it might be time to say some nice things. I did enjoy reading the story. For example, it was actually quite educational in terms of teaching me a bit more about medieval society (which, as a fantasy nerd, I care about) and some of different realities of the time. Additionally, despite the grievances listed above, the story is rather good and I was excited throughout. The characters are well constructed and one can never be sure of everyone's motives. While some people seem trustworthy, the truth is always a surprise.
The story is well crafted and has good characters, so there is little more that one can ask. Of course I did anyway. I liked the book and the story enough that I will probably read the next in the series at some point, but I doubt that I'll be able to make it through all 21
7/10

Needful Things

Stephen King is one of the best known authors of our time. His works have been adapted for television and movies, many of which are well respected and even award winning. He attacks various topics from innumerable directions. I had read the first two books in the Dark Tower series and had given up, but I'd heard from many that those were different from his other work, so, when I saw Needful Things at a used book sale I decided to give it a try.

Title: Needful Things
Author: Stephen King
Format: Book
Time to Finish: 34 days

I read the introduction and first chapter and was hooked. The stories revolves around the small town of Castle Rock, Maine, where a new business has opened. It is called Needful Things, and sells exactly what you're looking for, but at a price. Part of the price is to play a trick on someone else, but the tricks, seemingly innocent at first become more and more dastardly and harmful. Soon the town is in chaos and watching it all is Mr. Gaunt, the proprietor of this new shop.

The solid premise, and King's writing is good enough to not distract most readers from the content. He's the problem with the book: being hooked for the first twenty pages does not guarantee you will devour the 630. I, in fact, did not. About 250 pages into the story I was ready to be done with the book, but was too stubborn to completely give up on it. I can read a 700 pages book and enjoy every word (A Song of Ice and Fire, King Killer Chronicles, Acacia) because often those books are developing a few characters very well, allowing them to endear themselves to the reader. In this doorstop of a novel, King spends his pages creating brief caricatures so that...SPOILERS...he could kill them a few minutes later. It's extremely tiresome and makes it so that you could not care less what actually happens to most of the characters. Creating a character 500 pages in for the sole purpose of killing some one and/or dying is lazy and meaningless to the story at large. The reader becomes so jaded about these people and their forced in stories that they are wont to roll their eyes and moan, "not another one." The multitude of undeveloped killable characters means that there is no emotional investment, and without that, readers start to wonder why they even bother. For me it was stubbornness, others may just worship Stephen King. Regardless, I'd say give this book a pass. It's not scary, creepy, or horrifying, but most tragically, it's not even interesting.
3/10

Monster Hunter International

I listened to this book a few years ago, and noticed that the most recent book in the series had been getting some press. I was in between books, so I figured that I'd give it another listen.

Title: Monster Hunter International
Author: Larry Correia
Format: Audio
Time to Finish: 12 days

The book follows Owen Pitt, an accountant, whose boss transforms into a werewolf and attacks him. He barely survives the encounter and is recruited to join MHI, Monster Hunters International. They are a group of skilled monster hunters for hire. It turns out that monsters are not only real, there are a lot of them and there's good money to be made hunting them. The big enemies for this story is a powerful being known as the Cursed One, who has bent a number of master vampires to his will. It's up to a reluctant alliance between government monster hunters and MHI to stop him before he fulfills his prophecy to "breaks time" and ends the world.

Oof, this story does not hold up to a second reading. In all honesty, I only finished because I wanted an opportunity to write my first negative review.
That said, I actually gave some thought to why this book seemed terrible this time around and came to a few conclusions. The first is that this book is pure gun porn. Correia was a fire arms instructor before becoming an author, and I think it's safe to say he's a bit of a gun nut. This becomes apparent very early on with intimate, loving descriptions of every firearm imaginable. It's kind of cool at first, but for those who do not believe guns are man's greatest invention, the weapon worship becomes tiresome. The book would likely be forty pages shorter without that content.
The second thing I realized is that this the book equivalent of a B-movie. Not a good B-movie that borders on becoming a quality movie, just a story of simple characters doing very predictable things. As one would expect, it's chock full of corny lines and over the top action scenes, but there's very little substance or heart to the story. This didn't seem like a problem, especially as early on the book is a bit tongue in cheek about how ridiculous some of it is. Sadly, as the story progresses this self-effacing sense of humor disappears and all we're left with is a cheesy plot taking itself much too seriously.
Probably the worst aspect is the characters themselves. Rather than deep, meaningful individuals, none of them has any depth. Instead we are left with caricatures and mediocre ones at that. The women are beautiful the men are defined by one feature and the goodguy always gets the girl. We know all these things to be true, so there's no sense of risk or urgency at any point of the story.
Don't get me wrong, parts of the story were fun and enjoyable, those just didn't do close to enough to salvage the book.
4/10

Promise of Blood

I started reading this book because a Goodreads book club I am in assigned it for March. Of course no one has commented on it other than me saying I liked the beginning. Hopefully as the month progresses I'll get to talk about it more.

Title: Promise of Blood
Author: Brian McClellan
Format: Audiobook
Time to Finish: 6 days

This is a very good book, without a doubt the best I've encountered for some time. The book is set in a magical fantasy realm in a region known as the Nine. The Nine refer to the Nine Kingdoms of the area, each of which is ruled by a king and his Privileged Cabal (privileged is the word for magician). The nine is also symbolic as the kingdoms were created by the Nine Gods, whose church is a major power in their own right with millions followers. One of the Nine, the kingdom of Andro, is ruled by a weak king, and the powdermage (Powermages are another sort of magician who use gunpowder to fuel their magic) Field Marshal Tamas organizes a coup. Sadly, no character can be trusted and soon what should have been a quick bloody coup has repercussions beyond anyone's wildest imagination.
The story primarily follows three characters. The first of these is Tamas as he tries to rule his new kingdom and keep the peace. The second is Taniel, Tamas' son, as he is tasked with killing a mysterious privileged whose power is beyond anything he comprehends. The third is Adamat, a retired police officer asked by Tamas to investigate the meaning of the dying words of Royal Cabal.
The setting and technology are similar of that to of late 1800's with non-automatic guns galore.
It's hard to explain why this book stands out from many other fantasy series. The magic is certainly unique and entertaining, especially after the reader learns exactly how it all works. And the book is well written, with moments of comedy, action, and suspense all interwoven into a fun and compelling narrative.
Probably the most important aspect of this story, and I would argue of any story, is the characters. McClellan creates three men all of whom have a military background, and two of whom are powdermages. It would be easy for the characters to all seem exactly the same, but that is not the case. Instead they are individually fleshed out and their personal motivations are separate and equally compelling. While there are similarities, each has his own strong identity and is likeable enough to make the reader care about him and his story.
All in all, this is a great book about magic, religion, revenge, honor, and everything in between. Any fan of fantasy, especially those who like guns and war will love this book.
9/10

Half the World

Another book finished, and the first Young Adult I've reviewed. With the amount of YA series becoming movies there has been some debate over the merits of adults (which many would argue I am) reading YA novels and series at all. I am not here to weigh in on such matters. I look for books that I think I'll enjoy. Today's review is of:

Title: Half the World
Author: Joe Abercrombie
Format: Kindle
Time to Finish: 4 days

This is the second book in the Shattered Sea Trilogy, Abercrombie's young adult trilogy. For those familiar with Abercrombie's work, they might wonder, how could one of the master's of dark, gritty fantasy write YA, wouldn't he lose all that makes him distinct and entertaining. The answer is no, it simply means there's no swearing, no in scene sex, and that the characters and teens. And yes, there is some angst. There is also bloodshed, death, back stabbing, and plans within plans. It is divided into four parts: 1 introducing assembling the crew, 2 traveling south, 3 time in the South, 4 events once they return to the North. Each part tells a slightly separate story and the divisions allows us to see the changes in the characters within the greater story.

The story picks up a few years after the end of Half a King, and follows two characters: Thorn and Brand. Thorn and Brand are teens who trained to be warriors, only to find the opportunity no longer available and themselves under the power of Father Yarvi (the protagonist from previous book). The book then follows their adventures as they search for allies for Gettland in wake of a war with the half the world controlled by the High King.
This is typical Abercrombie, albeit tempered to convince parents that the book is ok for their children to read. As usual, there are fantastic battle scenes, absurd events, hilarious dialogue, and general fun. There is also the fact that no character is exactly what they seem. Everyone has a dark side, whether they admit it or not, and no one finishes the journey unscarred.
One worry I had was that final climax would be too predictable. It wasn't even for Abercrombie twisted sense of humor and honor, it was rewarding and exciting.
There really isn't too much else to say, it was well written, funny, and very easy to read. It's a good book for anyone interested in Dark Fantasy. Give it a read even though it's technically YA.
8/10

The Cold Dish

I'm a fan of Audible.com and have used it for years. They had a two for the price of one deal, so I took advantage of that and got a few books that jumped out at me. The first of these was a mystery that has now inspired a TV show

Title: The Cold Dish
Author: Craig Johnson
Format: Audiobook
Time to Finish: 6 days

The book takes place in Absaroka County, a (fictitious) rural part of Wyoming near Little Big Horn. Walt Longmire is the aging sheriff, nearing his retirement. As winter approaches his department receives a call from some hunters claiming they found a body. The skeptic sheriff and his deputy humor the hunters and soon find the body of Cody Pritchard, a young man convicted of gang raping a Cheyenne girl two years earlier. Pritchard got off with what all but himself consider too light a sentence. While coincidental, there seems to be no connection between Pritchard's death and his previous crimes. The case is ruled a hunting accident. But another body a few days later causes the sheriff to reconsider.
There were many aspects of the book that spoke to me. One such feature was the location and the implications that came with it. Being in rural Wyoming puts the white characters near to Indian Reservations and inevitably there is interactions between the two nations. This was not only fun to read about, but a new experience for me. As a fantasy fan, I have little experience with Native American characters, and it was enjoyable seeing them portrayed here. Henry Standing Bear is arguably the most important Native American character. He's Walt's best friend, and while he holds to some beliefs and practices that are different from the white characters, he is not portrayed as some alien other that cannot be understood. He is a man, like any other, albeit one who doesn't use contractions. This juxtaposition of the two cultures added another dimension to the story that is not often found. Characters on both sides despicable or heroic or both, showing the humanity and equally despite the racial divide. In general, Walt is accepted by the Native population, and so are we as the readers.
Another dimension of the story is Walt getting his life together. When he first meet him, he lives in a ramshackle cabin with exposed wiring and a shower that's a faucet sticking out of the wall. With Henry's help he starts exercising, hires contractors, and even starts talking to women. This is fun because we are able to feel closer to our protagonist and learn more about his personality and history. As a bonus we are exposed to his hilarious interactions with Henry and Vonnie (the love interest).
All in all, Johnson is able to weave all these elements together into a compelling and interesting story. It weren't for a tiresome epilogue I would have nothing to complain about.
Mystery fans, have at it.
7/10

Note: as mentioned above, there is a TV show Longmire based on the series. I started watching the it, but stopped. The book is much better. The book's story is more compelling and the characters are given more depth.